Double-whammy rejection.
Rejectionblog received these following form rejection letters by e-mail. The sender noted that he/she received these e-mails within 24 hours of each other. He/She noted that he/she selected minimum wage on the application, yet still didn't have a salary requirement closely meeting their business needs.
AutomationManager@brassring.com
Neatorama has a link to a cute rejection letter from Mad Magazine
The creators of Rejection Blog would like to apologize to the people who are still coming to our page every day despite no new content recently, we've each found gainful employment and have been pretty busy working at the bottom of our respective totem poles. We're getting ready to reboot the Rejection Blog, so stay tuned for new content and maybe even a total website overhaul! If you have any suggestions, shoot them over to rejectionblog@gmail.com, and as always, send us any of your rejections you may be receiving!
From: JPMorgan Chase
To: Name Redactedr
Sent: [Date] [TIME]
Subject: Junior Strategic Analyst, Global Marketing-[number] at JPMorgan Chase
Dear [Name]:
Thank you for your interest in the position of Junior Strategic Analyst, Global Marketing at JPMorgan Chase. After careful consideration, we regret to inform you that you have not been selected for this position.
Your profile will remain in our system. We encourage you to continue to explore other positions that match your skills and interests. If you selected the option in your profile, you may receive emails from our system regarding other positions that match the preferences you indicated in your profile. We encourage you to visit our career site from time to time to update your profile, in “My Job Finder”, apply for other positions, and learn more about JPMorgan Chase. For your convenience please bookmark this URL, , www.jpmorganchase.com/careers.
We thank you again for your interest and wish you all the best in your career.
Sincerely,
JPMorgan Chase Staffing
This email address is not monitored, so please do not reply to this message.
To: [Name redacted]
Sent: [xxxx] February [xxx] 2010 x:xx xx]
Subject: Your Application at Random House
Dear [Name],
Thank you very much for your application and for your interest in
the Publicity Assistant position.
Unfortunately, this position has been filled. Please continue to
review our open positions online and apply to those that are of
interest to you. Thank you again for your interest in employment
with Random House.
Regards,
Random House Human Resources Short and to the point, but nothing especially wrong with this rejection. I just don't
understand why more companies cannot even provide a simple form letter like this to
rejected applicants. Probably half of the companies people are applying to these days
won't even demonstrate this small common courtesy to their applicants, so it's refreshing
to see a large corporation like Random House making that small effort to bring a small
bit of closure to a process that never really ends. 
I love euphemisms. By disguising negativity with flowery prose, many people get distracted from the message at hand. Here are some translations of the statements in this letter to layman terms:
I'm afraid Grove/Atlantic is a small publishing house and we have to be selective about what we take on. (Translation: "We don't have the kind of budget to take on a project that we think will fail.")
Due to limited resources of time and manpower, we cannot accept unsolicited manuscripts or manuscripts that do not come to us through a literary agent. (Translation: "If you're not good enough to have someone take care of these things for you, we're not interested.")
As you may already know, there are several books on the market that can be useful for beginning an agent search. (Translation: "Obviously, you're going to need a lot of help to actually find someone willing to represent you.")
Thank you for thinking of us, and good luck with the project. (Translation: "Please never contact us again.")
Now don't you feel better?
Normally, I would find some way of mocking the self-proclaimed "best job in the world," but I don't think anyone would argue the merits of this gig. Check out the job description:
The role of Island Caretaker is a six-month contract, based on luxurious Hamilton Island in the Great Barrier Reef. It’s a live-in position with flexible working hours and key responsibilities include exploring the islands of the Great Barrier Reef to discover what the area has to offer. You’ll be required to report back on your adventures to Tourism Queensland headquarters in Brisbane (and the rest of the world) via weekly blogs, photo diary, video updates and ongoing media interviews. On offer is a unique opportunity to help promote the wondrous Islands of the Great Barrier Reef.
It looks like the contest is over (for now), but check out the full description if you want to try to take over in a few months.
National Football League
Internships
To: Internships
This year we received a record number of applicants from across the country and abroad. The selection committee reviewed hundreds of applications and after careful consideration we are unable to offer you a position for summer of 2009. The committee enjoyed your application but at this point we do not have a spot.
Please feel free to re‐apply next year for SIP 2010.
Thank you again for your interest and best wishes.
As one of the best talent agencies in the world, I bet the guys at CAA could have anyone they want.